She stood before the congregation as the minority, with her blond hair, brown eyes and pale skin. She was the daughter of a Pastor, mom of three, married to an Italian man whose cultural history was different than her own. Her message was titled Serving without Sinking, but as she shared tidbits of her own story, I could hear commonalities. She compassionately stated how embarrassed she was of her history and how the blatant unrest in our nation stirred-up very meaningful conversation between her, her family, friends and colleagues. During these newly addressed conversations, she realized – we (people in general) often only give out as much information as we believe necessary. That is when I found myself reflecting. It was not long after, that I also found myself in agreement. It is true; we seldom go beyond the surface in our sharing. We are very careful of only letting people know what we desire them to know. We usually – more often than not- give just enough. We rarely give our listener the true depth of who we are, the details of how we became the person we have become, or the density of what we believe.
Sadly, no one is exempt of this type of half-handed disclosure. We cover all our relationships with the same carefulness. We delegate according to what is the most safe and self-preserving. We shuffle out specifics with ourselves in mind. Sharing what we deem glorious, yet, holding on to our deepest disappointments, far-flung failures, and despairing downpours. Our walls of protection are usually far above our heads; limiting our view of others, as well as, limiting others view of us.
One of the things I like most about the Bible is that it is unedited. God did us a great justice by allowing us to know the heart stones of many we would consider as heroes. We get to see David in every hue possible. God shares with us David’s bad choices and bad behaviors, as well as, his rightful remorse and deep pleas for forgiveness. We are privy to David’s life: good and bad. From the days of David’s youth, until his death; the life of David is HOT – Honest for critique, Open for assessment and Transparent to all willing to live and learn from it.
As I climb over the walls in my own life, I look out and I can see beyond the surface. I see cracks and crevices where meaningful conversations can and should be had. Conversations no longer sealed for dread of criticism or guarded for protection. No holding on for safety or fear of falling, and no fear of hitting bottom.